“Two Blueberry Muffins”- Novel Excerpt

This week, I am sharing on of my favorite chapters from my work in progress, the novelization of my second film, “The Hepburn Girls.” This is still very much rough draft form, but I’d love to hear your feedback, and if it is something you would enjoy reading once the novel is complete.

For a synopsis of the film, please visit my tab labeled “The Hepburn Girls.”

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Two Blueberry Muffins

Lunchtime finally rolls around and I tuck myself away in my favorite reading area. I never eat in the break room. It smells like burned popcorn tinged with the lingering aroma of stinky burritos. Instead, I like to eat the same way I work, surrounded by intelligent words. I am nose deep in a novel when I hear some rustling and the chair scrape beside me. I look up into the face of pure joy in human form.

Larry Louis is my classmate from high school. We used to ride the bus together before Alfred started driving. With Will Smith’s movie star good looks and a personality to match, Larry grew up to become our town’s mailman and favorite citizen.

A long time ago, I teased him about becoming mayor of the city since he seemed to already know everything about everyone anyway. He just smiled and shook his head.  I knew him well enough to read between the lines. While the suit of politics would fit him perfectly, his shoes of service were workman’s boots. To stuff him away in an office would kill his joy; he preferred to serve man and commune with God in nature.

I never brought it up again.
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Vacation – Tybee Island, Georgia

Check out this incredibly clever blog, toemail!! 🙂

Adventures in Elevators

Following are two completely different experiences I had while riding the elevator.

Going Up?

Any time we travel to Atlantic City, I spend a lot of time riding the elevators. If I happen ride with a group of people, they fall into two categories, there is the ride packed with bodies, no small talk, and no eye contact. Or, there are the 20 second chit-chatters, saying things like,

“Going up?”

“Yes.”

“Me too!”

“Having fun?”

“Yes.”

“Me too!”

Occasionally, though, there are stand out moments. Once, I found myself boarding with a bellhop.
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7 Stages of Musical Theatre Insanity

7 Stages of Musical Theatre Insanity
(For R.C. & J.M. – with great affection)

You just needed some green beans for your pork chop dinner, when right there, between the hominy and the peanut butter is the woman of your dreams. What to do with the song in your heart that is fighting to burst forth? Naturally, you do a spontaneous tap dance with the clerk and three other customers and then grab her hands for a harmonized duet, allowing the melodic strains to take you both to the peaks of brand-new, but absolutely true, love.

At least, that’s what you’d do in Musical Theatre. In real life, bouts of unplanned singing tend to be met with the side-eye from grocery store clerks. There’s an old saying that goes, “Behind every great musical, there is an equally great, but clearly insane, Director.”

That’s not true. I just made that up.

In reality, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Below is a rare glimpse into the mind of a Director as he (or she) trips through the following psychological land mines with varying degrees of success.

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Looking, Leaping and Making a Splash

I don’t so much leap into a new adventure as I throw myself unabashedly off the cliff of possibilities into the lake of promise. It might be why I currently have more irons than wrinkled shirts, but oh how I love the rush of adrenaline that hits when new project presents itself.

Today, I officially released the information on my latest endeavor, “The Theatre Downstream.” How this came about is another peg in the board of my belief that the path we follow leads us to everyone and everything we are supposed to meet and do.

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Dear Katelyn

Dear Katelyn,

I know this may be difficult for you to believe, seeing as there are hundreds of babies born every day, and you might be concerned that your parents were exaggerating, but, your Mom and Dad are correct when they inform you that on June 12, 2014, you were the most beautiful, perfect soul to enter this world. For the first few days of your existence, your mother was heard to utter over and over, “Isn’t she the cutest thing EVER?” to anyone who would listen.

Right now, things are still really fresh and new (and cold) to you, and you’re awesome at sleeping a lot, so I’m happy, as one of your surrogate Aunts, to give you a quick family history, and to talk about perfect timing.

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The Golden Corral Bathroom Cookie War Radio Drama

The Golden Corral was the second stop of the day after wandering aimlessly around the massive expanse of a retail store that is the “Bass Pro Shop.” From one sensory overload to another, it was an afternoon of indulgence that only Southerners know how to partake of.

After feasting on the smorgasbord like Templeton the Rat at the fair, I made the necessary bathroom visit before departing. A few seconds behind me followed a very impressive child screamer of about five years old or younger, and his mother.

(Reminder: This encounter was so impressive, I’m writing a post about it, so don’t stop reading yet.)

I must confess that I stayed in the stall longer than I should have to listen to the outcome. It turned out to be dinner and a show. But more like a Radio Drama, since, you know, I couldn’t see their faces.

Scene: Golden Corral Bathroom

Sobbing child enters, followed by Mother.

Wait….I must edit that. Not sobbing.

Gut wrenching, melodramatic screaming child enters followed by Mother.

Better.

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An Evening with Deana

This entry is from a journal I keep on occasion called, “Every Day Moments.” It was begun during a time when I needed to see the good in every day situations to cope with grief.

My beloved pet cat Sammy passed away about six weeks prior to this entry. His sister Deana, mentioned below, passed away on January 2nd of this year. Both had kidney issues. 

They were only in my life for just over four years, but brought me immeasurable joy, and I miss them. Occasionally, I will share more memories as they come to mind.

May 31st, 2013

“The day after Sammy passed, I started visiting the Humane Society once a week after work. I stood there, desolate, and told them I just needed to hold a black cat. It was the best way I knew how to cope and still function. I met many, many beautiful souls there. I’ll tell their stories another day.

Today, after a long day of work cleaning and being cooped up indoors, I came home and let all my remaining animals outside. Right now that total stands at two dogs and one cat, but tomorrow that will change. Two sweet black male cats are coming home to live with me. I know my two new friends won’t be able to replace Sam, but I’m hoping it will help me move forward.

As I sat down on the ledge of flowers we planted near his grave, I sighed. I know it’s silly and probably pointless, but every time I pass his grave I want to to, or do, say “Hi Sam.” For nearly four years, I said that every time I saw him, and I still miss saying it.

Deana followed close behind me, as usual. Whenever we go to that area of the garden, she always ends up sitting on the stone marker. Do I think she knows Sammy’s there? No; but it moves me when I see her perched there. I do think she sleeps under the couch now because that’s where he slept. Knowing things will change tomorrow, I wanted to spend as much time as possible with her tonight.

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“Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” ~Winston Churchill

Secret to Success

“Don’t Worry, Be Livid”

McDonald’s has long been a place of happiness for many children and adults. The toys, the playground, the clown with the frozen smile. They even have a meal named after the emotion.

However, in recent years, complaints arose about the decline in customer service. Among the most prevalent was the admonition that drive thru attendants were rude or neglectful. In response, management enforced a strict, “GET HAPPIER” campaign. The drive thru attendants began doing just that; smiling, asking how customers were, wishing them a good day, etc.

Just so you know I’m not making this up:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/11/mcdonalds-orders-more-friendly-service_n_3060820.html

It was shortly after this incentive first rolled out that I got to experience this new and improved customer service. Pulling up to collect my lunch, I was greeted by a ridiculously enthusiastic boy in his early twenties with a 1,000 mega watt smile that reached up past his bright blue eyes and well into his blonde hairline.

There was a slight delay with my food, so he engaged me in some friendly chit chat directly in line with the initiative. He asked what my order had been, how my day was going and then explained the delay was partly due to how busy they had been that day. He revealed that in fact, his shift was supposed to have ended at 1pm.

“Oh! I’m so sorry!!” I replied as I glanced at the clock, which now read 4pm. “Don’t worry about it!” he cheerfully continued. “They’ve cut my hours, so I’m making up the time!”

By this point, my drink order was filled and he passed it along through the window. Distracted by a figure across the parking lot, he asked me, “Is that Martha??” I dutifully followed his gaze and considered a moment. I then responded honestly, “I have no idea.” Realizing his error, he laughed. “No, we had a lady quit recently, and she was one of my favorites. That looks just like her.”

Now back on track, he continued, “We’re just waiting on your nuggets.”

“Okay.” Not used to drive thru conversational etiquette, I fell silent.

To prevent a further lull in conversation that could possibly be misconstrued as rudeness on his part, he started over. “How are you today?”

Having nothing else pressing, I decided to join him in the do-over. “I’m great! How are you?”

He beamed back at me. “I’m just livid.”

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