Betrayal is a heavy stone
that weighs down the
pockets of my mind.
It frays the seams,
and nudges other
more important thoughts
out of my soul.
It wearies me, worries me
and begs for my attention.
The wounds cut even deeper
when the Betrayer has
gloated to others about
the success of their crime.
I pray for relief and for release -
through forgiveness first,
and finally, the blessing of
Indifference
where pain ceases,
and peace begins.
Another moment from the archives of last year. I had a LOT of feelings to work through, and I'm grateful for the time of reflection.
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I SO struggle with this! There was a situation with our youngest son when he was a senior. We were betrayed by him when he walk away from us and turned to another family as ‘his’. We were cheated out of all the activities kids go through in their senior year. God was merciful and restored our relationship with our son to an extent. Things have never been ‘like before’. I still hold on to that pain and to the animosity I have towards the woman (a mother herself) who started the wheels turning to our son leaving, then enabling him.
As a Christian, I know the right thing to do. But as a failing human, I am unable to let it go. And it has been 11 years. I know I am fool, a stubborn one, I guess
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I’m so sorry that happened to you all. 😦 You’re not a fool in the least. I can completely see why you were hurt, and why it would take a LONG time to heal. I don’t know why some things are easier to forgive than others. I have things that I still struggle to forgive from 15 years ago, some from 10 years ago, and some from last year! It’s HARD, and that letting go is brutal! Writing about it has been one of the best catharsis for me. It helps to get that emotion out of my body and onto the page. It’s like it releases it somehow. Some of the pain is still there, but every time I write, it feels like it’s less. I also read from the book of Proverbs every day. I figure if he was the wisest man to ever live, then what he has to say will help, and it does. I’ll pray that you find some peace and the ability to overcome that feeling of betrayal. Sending you love.
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